I have seen this same problem addressed over and over in many different incarnations.

For some reason people believe that to RP...means you MUST pre-announce your intentions towards other players in your area when you walk in. Thusly the other players in the area won't be taken surprise when you decide to attack them.

I'll break it down as easily as possible. If I am a paladin..and ANYONE comes into the area that COULD possibly be an enemy. I'm going to be wary at first..until such time as I've ascertained whether or not they/he/she/it is a threat. If it is the situation you describe and your a paladin and he is a dark-elf. I am going to ASSUME that he is an enemy and attack HIM on sight. This is the nature of the PK/RP balance. If Im good...and he's evil. Its pretty much going to be a throwdown. Unless for some reason he starts yelling, Wait, Wait..I wish to see the redemption of the Light, please don't kill me! Then I might take a moment to listen to his pleas, and decide whether he is worthy of it or not.

At Carrion Fields you will decidedly NOT get the RP of "I come for you, Lightwalker!" because usually what ends up happening is your foes will quaff a recall potion or simply just start running thus reducing the element of surprise.

Lastly I will encourage you to use Who PK, Whe PK, and Whe so often that you begin to type them when your chatting with friends and writing biology papers. I know I do. Its so ingrained into my typing fingers I have a hard time not doing it while logged in as an imm, when it really doesnt matter!

In a real world where people are out to kill you. I'd be looking over my back a LOT, and assuming anyone who I haven't talked to yet...is out to kill me. But that's just me.

Hope you can take the advice of the other posters and learn to regear and take deaths in stride because once you do, the game becomes a rich, rewarding experience.

Enjoy the game!

Corrlaan followers are NICE. With a capital NICE!