  role feedback please,
dro,
31-Oct-23 12:22 PM, #1
 Curious,
jalbrin,
31-Oct-23 05:09 PM, #2
 RE: Curious,
dro,
31-Oct-23 06:35 PM, #3
Did you already purchase the pbf?,
NoobAgain,
02-Nov-23 09:30 AM, #4
RE: Did you already purchase the pbf? Yes Nt,
dro,
02-Nov-23 09:48 AM, #5
role feedback: you should have a role (no pbf still),
NoobAgain,
02-Nov-23 04:09 PM, #6
The role did not make sense to me,
NoobAgain,
07-Nov-23 06:25 PM, #7
Agreed,
kbd,
08-Nov-23 06:02 AM, #8
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dro | Tue 31-Oct-23 12:22 PM |
Member since 16th Feb 2019
66 posts
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#145547, "role feedback please"
In response to Reply #0
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i tried to put some IC lore in it didnt add it until i saw i wouldnt delete over forms I took some effort writing it
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jalbrin | Tue 31-Oct-23 05:09 PM |
Member since 20th Apr 2009
211 posts
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#145550, "Curious"
In response to Reply #1
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I totally get the, "not gonna put the role in until I know the forms work out," style of play.
Except you're saying the forms worked out and you deleted after 70 hours anyway?
Why?
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dro | Tue 31-Oct-23 06:35 PM |
Member since 16th Feb 2019
66 posts
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#145553, "RE: Curious"
In response to Reply #2
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might not have got traction bc i put it in so late. the role was very much a prologue the next chapter required induction and after 70 it felt like i was wasting my time when i do this scion app thing since i cant alt i get new char ideas in my head the whole time eventuslly hours of crickkets got me to do the give up alt i could have used anexplore alt but im starting to get used to this one daily driver thing
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NoobAgain | Thu 02-Nov-23 09:30 AM |
Member since 01st Mar 2007
411 posts
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#145561, "Did you already purchase the pbf?"
In response to Reply #1
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dro | Thu 02-Nov-23 09:48 AM |
Member since 16th Feb 2019
66 posts
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#145562, "RE: Did you already purchase the pbf? Yes Nt"
In response to Reply #4
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NoobAgain | Thu 02-Nov-23 04:09 PM |
Member since 01st Mar 2007
411 posts
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#145563, "role feedback: you should have a role (no pbf still)"
In response to Reply #1
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NoobAgain | Tue 07-Nov-23 06:25 PM |
Member since 01st Mar 2007
411 posts
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#145582, "The role did not make sense to me"
In response to Reply #1
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I think a summary / overview would have helped a lot. Think of a role as an overview of the character rather than a “cool story”. I hope this makes sense.
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kbd | Wed 08-Nov-23 05:57 AM |
Member since 07th May 2022
34 posts
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#145585, "Agreed"
In response to Reply #7
Edited on Wed 08-Nov-23 06:02 AM
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It's a bit all over the place without really saying much of the actual background of the character. How did it grow up, what are its core values, principles, outlook on life, ...
Something I see a lot in pbf Imm comments is variants of 'A neat bullet point summary of the character and its viewpoints' being mentioned. You can assume Imms like that.
Just adding a single entry like that will already get you far. I like adding story, poetry or songs, but I try to make that very clear from the title, like a little 'read at your own peril' warning I suppose.
I might add entries like this:
1: A concise background summary, plans and desires
2: The story of my youth
3: "Death, the great equalizer", a song about Weh
If an Imm wants to know what makes you tick it's clear they only need entry 1. They can choose how much time they spent reading the rest.
Stylistically, use lines to let the text breath. Entries can be quite long (around four A4 pages I think, a lot!), let the text grow vertically. The third entry does that better.
I do like the effort you put in it, keep it up! If you like that sort of thing you could watch videos on creative writing on youtube or even buy books.
You can also use the rolecontest history list to look up characters on the PBF and check their comments (and role entries).
Have fun and GLWYN.
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