Fri Jan 20 05:36:09 2006

At 9 o'clock AM, Day of the Bull, 1st of the Month of the Heat
on the Theran calendar Kharnik perished, never to return.

It seemed that you just gave up when you started hitting hero ranks...but I Guess some people are suicidal like that. I try my best NOT to die, not to find ways of dying Anyway, like the rp and all that jazz and good luck with your next. And I know you will probably make another goodie(but not necessarily fortressite).

and it was before the hero ranks. way before
I was trying NOT to give up and keep on plugging away
but yeah it all went out of the character early on.

Aarn said come back to the Fort soon, I did, Too soon.
When playing the character not only is no longer fun,
but you are playing because you are bored and it doesn't
even relieve the boredom, but pisses you off more from
moment to moment, it's time to quit.

I was going to post something about when you want to
strike down your cabal mates, but heh Nep already
posted that in shok's forum (I was just going there
to post something about that, but you covered it far
better than I would have.)

I knew when I was at 30th level that I should ignore the
people wanting to rank. I didn't. and it just got worse
from there. *rofl*

For the druids: No way was I going to try to kill you. I wouldn't even
strike at neutral mobs. I'd try to run if that was available, if not I'd just stay with the mob you rescued yourself with and start thinking of where to regear I thought throwing my naked self at
your feet would make you lay off a bit couple of con for being able to fight the empire again, was a worthwhile trade for me, but you
mr. Ysomething guy, just wouldn't do it. *grumble*

I was going to delete a LONG LONG time ago, but I kept telling myself, just make it to hero and then delete. I just couldn't take it anymore, it actually made me nauseous to play.

Work's real busy now anyway, I don't need a fun character I can get into making me want to log on while I'm up at work now anyway so it worked out for the best.

Needed a break at the end of Feichin and didn't take it.
(Boredom is an evil evil thing)
I'd say I'm taking one now, but I just know I'll be staring at the walls at 3 am unable to sleep and end up rolling something.

I think I know what to do to get myself on track again CF-wise.
For those I offended feel free to express yourself.
I'd rather hear honesty. I can work with honesty to make my
next character better. (Subtle hints won't cut it, I'm a bit dense for that, be brutal, I can handle it. and it'll help.)

Anyway I'm going to have a drink and see what I can come up with that will be FUN for once. heh.

I like how you just kept on plugging. Admittedly, tripping over your corpse constantly was annoying, but only because of the deep sense of "bleh" some of those deaths left me with. I could tell you were getting bored, but I think some people needed to remember this is a game and knock off the "Kill guy, wait for guy to unghost, wash, rinse, repeat" nonsense.

If you haven't gotten it yet, I'll get your PBF.

I'm not too concerned about deaths of any kind.
The spam-dying is a routine I do when I catch myself
upset at loss of gear or something. I go out and
die naked ALOT. and then it makes it okay, does that
make any sense? It reminds ME that it is a game and
that I don't really have to care what happens to the
guy I'm playing. I sometimes get a little too sucked in.

I'm starting to feel indebted with the pbf's So let's not
When I get around to it I'll get it. I don't want to end up
one day feeling crappy about people getting mine and then
blowing a paycheck on pbfs hehe.

Sci was pretty cool, I liked him alot.

Hey - now I feel terrible about all those times I dragged you with me to level! Sorry about that, I wouldn't have been offended at all if you'd told me to get lost because you wanted to rank sit a little.

Other than that, I really liked the character. I'm sorry the Outlander thing was so hard, but don't be afraid to ask for more help. If you didn't have money for potions, mention so! Acolytes are sort of there to help you out with things like that. I know you want to play a selfless paladin, but no one can help you if they don't know!

Good luck with your next, come back to the Fort soon!

No I couldn't have told you no, or I would have hehe.
The outlanders were just irritating is all, like when Yguy
couldn't harm them and I'm in mid battle with them in balator, he hits me so of course they come along behind and hammer me into the dirt. Or Defending while they sit outside the fort hehe.
It wasn't that I couldn't GET money (All my chars have a knak for it.)
It was there was no time to do so. We go raid.. uhh okay.
raid goes bad.. get out.. uhh can't. etc.. ad infinitum ad nauseum.
And no I wasn't playing a selfless paladin, or I'd have applied for scribe And no I'm not going to ask for help. It's stupid as I can get what I need myself. Few of my characters really ask for help.
There isn't any point. If you are playing evil, asking for help is.. uhh asking your group/cabal/etc. to kill you hehe.
If you are in the fortress, well it's better to take care of it yourself 'Help' there has killed me more often than anything except gangs of imperials.
Uncaballed? better to do it yourself.

*this part added later*
And noooooo. Not good job, I was a crappy paladin.

I remember thinking, wow, this guy's doing pretty well for himself. I have a little soft spot for paladins and was cheering for you.

Then you hit hero range and died about 30 straight times. Le sigh.

I don't know how you pull out of a massive death spiral like that, but I wasn't surprised to see you delete.

To be honest the deaths had not one teeny thing to do with me
deleting. I mean come on I played nimelerion. I can take more deaths in a shorter time than anyone It is my one 'gift' when it comes to playing CF *rofl*
It was totally other things, rolling the char right after I broke up with the girlfriend I'm sure had alot to do with it all.
(Scary enough he was doing well until she and I started talking again)
Hahahaha.
Started to write some other things, but best keep all that jazz to
myself.
The rest is internal issues with how things are in my little escapism fantasy world that is Cf.
(I.E. frustration is caused when what you think is reality runs counter to the real thing. ex: driving in traffic how many people get mad at something another driver does and says Hey! he can't do that! <duh, sparky, he just did!> but you got frustrated because you expected the other driver to do something else and that's didn't happen. Well let's just say sharing my little fantasy world with 80+ players and a handful of immortals has it's down sides. Luckily most of the people are down right 'good folk' and they bring in far more upsides to compensate.)

So yeah I know I'll be back, but I really REALLY have to take a break this time.