Mon Jan 31 20:51:09 2022

At 3 o'clock AM, Day of the Great Gods, 19th of the Month of Winter
on the Theran calendar Atrissa perished, never to return.

Very well done with Atrissa.

I was really looking forward to that event you mentioned.

Well done and good luck with whatever comes next from you:-)

This is for you and Ithy
.
.
.
Upon these darken shores I rest
Staring out upon the Horizon west
The sleepy sun falls beneath the waters
And the moon on high flutters

I sit upon these darken shores
Watching the stars glitter above
One such star radiates so bright
Yet it darkens from its long fight

Upon these darken shores I look
How the world changed, how it shook
The moon weeps is sad sad song
The current, its memories sweeps us along

And on these darken shores I wept
Your deeds and words shall be kept
Upon these darken shores I knelt
My words spoken how I felt

Upon these darken shores I left...

Amayra

Well I like this one a lot better than your other two! Thank you!

Good luck with a great quirky character- really regret not being able to play more mind games with you (yeah Atrissa wanted to get to the bottom of you, but you got her in a corner on her heels multiple times).

Sorry for laughing. It really was just such an Atrissa move.

Thanks for everything. You showed me the world and drank all my wine and answered all my silly questions and got me killed for turkey that one time. You shone brighter than any Light and you may have stopped shining now, but I still care. Loved the stories, the songs, the secrets and the adventures.

Sorry it had to end so abruptly. It really is a shame. I was prepared for it to come but not so soon, so this really did hurt. There are so many things you will never get to tell me now, I had finally found my voice, we would have done such great things. And I am really, really sad.

Had a ton of fun playing with you, you really have a way of bringing out the best and worst in people. Loved your descriptions, you have a great voice and made me laugh very hard at things I really shouldn't have.

Good luck.

It was such an Atrissa move I immediately thought of Amayra telling me in the black dragon lair that I shouldn't just pick anything up and wear it, and then just throwing on that veil and preening around in it. I hope you're happy Amayra! (if only I thought to say that when I was a ghost).

You really started to find your footing and I was loving the rapport we had! It hurts so much because suddenly the Inn is burgeoning with life - Atrissa's own pocket audience to play with! - and Atrissa goes and rides her motorcycle off a cliff.

So yes, I tried on some blademaster's gloves and accidentally age-poofed myself. I was a 79-year-old human. That was just an unbelievable, horrible gut punch. I've been full looted, insta-killed off of wrong turns, but I always had the option to pick myself up and try again. I never cared about a character like this one. I was not ready to quit.

Through Atrissa I rediscovered a love of writing and interacting, and had honestly no idea what a rich world of interactive writing CF can be. I barely learned the bard class because instead I had so much fun performing and talking in depth with folks. That's why I got so annoyed with shapeshifters - all October these rando's would hit me up with these wild and in-depth characters I'd get intrigued by and then just vanish. Well not all of them, of course...

Atrissa was the product of a lot of thought over a summer of not playing, after having come back for a fun stint. I wondered why no CF bards ever sing, and I saw Elton John/Queen biopics and wondered what a pop/rock star might look like in Thera. I probably wrote at least half of her songs/poems over the summer on my phone while walking my dog, but I didn't seriously think I would pull it off. I had the idea of sloth because pop stars always seem to party hard and mess themselves up (mission accomplished!), and I also thought the whole idea of being talented but wasting it was fun to explore. Of course, I did not count on Gwendelya and Rarywey.

Gwendelya, you basically took me right out of role whenever I was with you, I just had so much fun. Atrissa fawning over you wasn't by design, it was bad RP and I seriously could not help myself. So I'd try to course-correct, then ultimately zoomed out and saw how things added up and let her story take its course.

Rarywey, you know you are amazing, you may or may not know you totally stressed me out! I would get so confused, but in the end would channel Atrissa and she'd work things out in her special way. That moment when you popped in on me and Aranir checking on Atrissa's mom, OMG. Thank you so much for taking in all Atrissa threw at you - the events, the silliness, soooo much. I would often worry if I was being too over-the-top, and you would always encourage me in different ways to not hold back, and so I didn't. For all those I annoyed, it's pretty much all Rarywey's fault.

Arstan, I had no idea how to handle you, but loved so much talking poetry and philosophy and everything else with you. Oh, I decided I loved you before you became a wight. Loser. Yep folks, that was Atrissa's deepest secret.

Dohri, Aranir, Shakiniel - being around you guys in CST mornings was such a highlight. Aranir, I figured out what you were up to too late. I was seriously going to send that note to you and RP all the love out. You were just incredible. That goblin poem, if only I'd written it out.

Vlijerous - I think I could have added a some fun depth to you if I played things differently. I considered slander, surrender, poetic justice, propaganda, gossip, bounties - all kinds of fun things, but the character ultimately wanted to be star who was above you - despite her frequent failures with that.

Dohri, the worst thing about Atrissa dying is NOT that I can't be a diva anymore, it's that I can't talk endlessly with you anymore, it's that I can't see how your arc unfolds. I ache thinking about you. I'll add more in your response.

There are so many others who played memorable roles in this character - Alyce, Darvel, Cal, Odren, Zicci, Tika!, Ceva, Rashign, Delkinen, Valarien, Ithy (of course!), Choursnkel, Rytohn, Brem, Hiilos, Riazle, Amayra, Grintella, Rokzar, Melethron, Rexan, Bokbok, Azorinne, Puddlepaws, Skreenak... I'm not ready to let go so if anyone wants any secrets I'll answer.

Oh, here is Atrissa's "Will." I wrote it out some time ago because I thought it would be funny to find in her corpse. Guess I should have signed that life insurance policy sooner, too.

-

Atrissa Amethiste's Last Will and Testament

To Skreenak: My soft, airy voice. You above all appreciated it, and your evildoings gave me the spark to be kinder. May it serenade you and your victims for eternity.

To Gwendelya: My heart. It's love for you was only outweighed by your love for everyone, and so from you I learned to give.

To Azorrine: My light. Your example against Skreenak stoked the kindness within me.

To Calithildir: You told me bards were immortal, I hope you are right. I leave you my harp. I autographed it.

To Chourskel: My anger. You deserve every ounce of it.

To Arstan: The thorn you embedded in my heart. It took root just before your becoming and I ever burned the worse for it.

To Wood-and-Bones: My lovely porcelain hands, which you so admired.

To Ithyssraya: My secrets. Enjoy the gossip of the world so that you may stab your friends ever easier.

To Vlijerous: My fingernails. If any wonder why I was ever examining them, it's because I was always imagining clawing out your hateful, covetous eyes with them.

To Zxctikazxcti: My pain. What else? You were a salve when I had none. Combine my pain with yours to make you ever stronger.

To Rexan: My pen. May you opt to wield it instead of your knife when you can - perhaps eradication need not be literal.

To Aranir: My bracelet of charms, where I hoarded every token of joy and burden I could. You lovingly shared and beared them with me with such blunt grace for so long, keep them now as you remember your love for me, and the joy and burdens we shared.

To Dohri: My words. I leave all my collected works to you.

To Rarywey: My spirit. It was never too much for you.

I did not realize how close I was to the truth when I told you that you need to start thinking of your legacy (with your hair turning twilight gray). What a wonderful (and at times intimidating - meaning "in awe of your RP") character! Bravo!

Thank you ICly (for you what did for Melethron) and OOCly (for having such an impactful character).

I really hate that I won't get to spend more time with you - I had a vision where old lady Atrissa would get progressively hostile and absent-minded and you'd be stuck helping her

>Through Atrissa I rediscovered a love of writing and interacting, and had honestly no idea what a rich world of interactive writing CF can be.

I love this, and I agree wholeheartedly. This game has always been an incredible creative outlet for me, and I'm so happy when people acknowledge it as a powerful tool and platform for expression.

>you may or may not know you totally stressed me out!

Atrissa's motivations were sometimes hard to pin down, so she earned a dose of fae mischief from me. After that first poem, I worried I came across too cruel, but we worked it all out in the end.

I'm surprised to find Atrissa was your first Herald--because she was pretty damn good at it. You made a strong point of interacting with as many people as possible for better or for worse, hosting TONS of events, and just in general being an all around Notable Presence

Oh. Some words to take with you on your final journey, may they express my admiration and eternally confound your spirit:

--Requiem for a Stolen Stage--

Sating those waiting for endless slumber,
Hating degrading, falling asunder.
Pray tell, oh pell-mell, whose spell you're under.
Don't dwell on eggshells, farewells or hunger.
You'll find hoary time unwinds your blunders.
No rhyme can enlimn this sublime wonder.
The song of your heart's a peal of thunder.
Try hard as you might, you'll get no younger,

But beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I beheld you beholden to something bolder.
The outpouring requires a vessel and a spout.
You certainly kept busy for a layabout.

gr

I quite like this poem much much much better! And it rhymes! Oh, how it rhymes. As in all your writings, there is so much density here I can have fun reading and re-reading it.

>> Atrissa's motivations were sometimes hard to pin down, so she earned a dose of fae mischief from me. After that first poem, I worried I came across too cruel, but we worked it all out in the end.

I'm glad you brought this up - at the risk of being too much (heh) I'll dive more into what was in my head. At first, I was feeling most "brazen and unashamed" with Atrissa. I had nothing to lose, I was just going to go for it and it was going really well. Except I started to fall out of character with Gwendelya, and then the first Skreenak thing put me in a position of having to figure out what Atrissa really thought of herself now.

And plus this new imm had just come along whose helpfile seemed to line up pretty good with my role, but I'd never had a religious character before - in fact, all my previous immteraction attempts had gone horribly wrong. I knew nothing of Rarywey the mortal, only that Rarywey the imm had been very nice to me. So what I wanted was to test the waters (boy it's easy to make water puns when you just let the river take you!), and what I thought i got was warm fuzzies to be me and follow my heart and not be afraid of change. And then it was like, Atrissa suddenly gets vulnerable for the first time ever, and this imm just mindfux her. So I worked it out with the handy role command, and let the chips fall where they may.

It did work out, but afterward I had a bad case of residual Immtimidation© - I did not give you very good one-on-one interactions, but stuck with it. I honestly didn't know if I was misreading you (I was - omg the whole sloth/poetry thing) or this was all part of the Rary experience. But as I told you, it was hard to ignore all the awesome interactions you gave me outside that shrine, and that meant everything.

I wasn't prepared for that. A shocking twist of an end, Atrissa fashion. It was easy being Gwen around you, you always gave me some reason to preach or encourage or console. All the drama! I felt bad having ended up on your list, but Gwen thought that she'd be passing the torch to you. Of course you took it the wrong way! I'm glad that wedge just sort of disappeared when the time came to say goodbye, but I wish we'd hashed it out sooner. That's death though, in it's raw and unforgiving purity. Sometimes you just have to reach back and trust in the strength of what you had because death seperated you during troubled times.

I still remember the Heralds finding the flyers you had me write for your performance at Bargalha's Tavern and throwing a fit, and I just calming explaining that I had scribed them for you to their bewilderment. I already knew then that I was going to recruit you. It's funny, as much as everything fell into Atrissa's lap(expert importing of role to reality by the way) she also made things easier on Gwen, who was free to pursue her explorations and punch stuff knowing you were scheming up the next party. Thank you for that and congrats on a great character.

Hah! I had no idea about the other Heralds being miffed - that gives me some satisfaction lol. I wanted Atrissa to be a star who came into the Inn with fanfare, who would ruffle all kinds of feathers. I guess that worked, tho I had no idea.

For the halloween incident, i was so terrified. I knew that typically heralds do stuff in october, and was trying to be a good herald lowbie, but when things didn't progress I saw opportunity for Atrissa's impatient and assertive side to bubble up - she got real conflicted and stomped up to Rary-shrine, and before I could even pray Tsiynil was talking to me, and basically encouraged me to not hold back (one of many occasions). I'm glad you didn't actually get annoyed at Atrissa just "Executanting" away with events. I'd never seen Gwendelya upset, and when you just sat next to me saying NOTHING after finding out I went and scheduled an event without your permission/input... I was pretty scared!

Finally, the absolute highlight of Atrissa's time in the Inn was when Puddlepaws was gone and you filled the brawling room with cats, and then they wandered all over the Inn!

In hindsight, the Expedition Leader may have ever been dragging lazy Atrissa on adventures, but Atrissa did a pretty good job of cementing you by the fire with wine and tea too.

I really really enjoyed Atrissa. I started hanging out at the Inn more often with you when we began searching for the "girl of my dreams" and that's when you really became a part of Delkinen's life. I tried to give you advice to deal with some things you told me was going on and I hope it helped. Good luck on your next endeavor, someone who puts so much time in on the creativity of the character like you have is a boon to this game.

Delkinen Windsinger

You were one of the first "big names" outside of the Inn to give Atrissa the time of day, and I got a feel for how to interact with new people from talking to you. Delkinen and Atrissa had such a good rhythm of dialogue, and you boosted my confidence a good bit in what I could pull off interacting with folks.

Really great, committed job on the character. Bummed I couldn't be around for a proper farewell. Learned a lot from Atrissa, both and in character and as a player. I'm excited to see what you go with next.

I was so grateful for Zicci - you have a really cool character, and Atrissa was soooo appreciative of your mischief and support of her. Sometimes she wasn’t 100% it was sincere! But her poem for was sincere, it wasn’t her trying to show off. In fact I find myself singing in my head, it’s to the tune of Kokomo Indiana by Japanese Breakfast

Atrissa,

You were the beautiful one
Commanding clouds to free the sun
Then screaming at the rain...

Oh Triss, you meant a lot to Tika. This will certainly cause some ripples. She inwardly wanted to hate Triss in the beginning, for her beauty and the way everyone fawned over her. But Atrissa's love and clever sense of mischief won out in the end. Every minute of it was fun. It was always pro RP in your company and you threw a strong pitch.

Well done.

Wow, this sums grownup Atrissa up pretty good!

> You were the beautiful one
Commanding clouds to free the sun
Then screaming at the rain...

Tika has such an awesome way of throwing together impromptu poetic lines like this, and you were the one char I could explore nuances of Rary-ism with. (WTH Ithy). You were firmly on Atrissa’s Good List - which was pretty much only you Dohri and Aranir as the only people she trusted before the new Heralds came (and I’m still not sure about you Zicci!). And seriously, over Christmas when I basically only played at midnight, you were all I had!

GLWYN

I really thought that I had more time. I wanted to give you one more thing but I guess it wasn't meant to be. Of course you would go when I couldn't be there to say goodbye properly.

I had such a wonderful time with you. Thank you so much for everything.

I am finding it hard to come up with something profound or funny or ..anything really. Let me just tell you, I am literally crying right now as I'm writing this. Maybe that says enough about how I much our time meant to me. I hope that doesn't make me seem too strange.
I never really thought this experience would conjure up such emotion, but here we are.

I will miss you very much.

Trust me, it hurts dying, too! I had so much fun with you, you play so cleverly, and it encouraged me to throw it right back at you. Ultimately, you were always there for me, not just support, but to basically play this game with. You, me, Shakaniel and Aranir had such an easy but challenging RP rhythm, I was often at my best with you. Seriously, I'd get so excited when I'd see you online, and you meant the world to Atrissa, who had, you know, MAJOR intimacy issues. That surprise party is, without question, the highlight of my 20 years of playing this game on and off.

The ghost stared at her own body, flooded with shame. She tried to cry, but could not. How she yearned for Dohri's hug... she was so cold! The crowd gathered, but Atrissa was ever so confused. She could not think, she could not feel anything but cold. Could Rarywey save her? Oh, how disappointed she would be...

Her most admired friend Gwendelya was there, as she was in the beginning, and calmed Atrissa's restless spirit. And so she could only think to sing! The song she'd once only sang for Tika and Zicci, and Dohri, but wanted the world to know, in her soft, airy voice:

-

I want to run with you-
I want to break through-
But I'm so-
Tired.

I hear all your tales,
Your sweet travails-
And then I-
Sigh.

Your flyyyyying, and I want to fly too,
And I'm trying-
To figure out how to tell you!
That I'm weighted, the way that I am,
I am fated-
To watch from the outside!

I touched your wounds-
Affected your mood-
But your scars-
Are yours.

More life you'll bring..
More songs I'll sing..
And I'll rest-
Unsure.

-

But no sound came out. Plus soccer practice had just ended and she pretty much had to go now.

Oh Atrissa...

I had so much fun RPing with you. I really hope it didn't get too creepy. I tried to keep it suggestive, but not overly pushy. Thanks for playing a long, and it's a shame I didn't "get" Atrissa for the shrine.

I was planning to have Atrissa written in as a mob to the shrine, all dolled up.

Thanks for all the fun times and GLWYN!

Your RP was so big in the beginning to this character! It let me know that this idea was something and Atrissa wasn't a waste of time. I've never had any character of significance, and was pretty much feeling my way. Whenever I saw you vis I was dying to send you a tell and invite you to the Inn, but, you know, Atrissa was terrified of you.

I've got a Will and Testament for her I'm gonna post later. You make out pretty good.

Your gift to me for my christmas event was one of the coolest things I have ever received (as a player or an Imm), and I was kind of taken aback. I couldn't bring myself to be the same toward you after that.

Your ability to give your characters depth and nuance is something that I am jealous of. Atrissa felt like someone I could have been meeting IRL and would not have known the difference. In comparison I often feel like mine are pretty narrowly focused on a specific item, but you seem to be able to breach many different topics in unique ways. You should be proud of this character and its impact.

Great job with Atrissa, and I can't wait to see what you do next.




Edited because Grammar is hard...

I do hope you claim. I want to know who played such a wonderful character. Not once did I ever have a poor time hanging out with you.

I did plan on deleting that one night to start this adventure which I'm now back and would of definitely auto-ed between.

I enjoyed our interactions a lot. It felt like well in char it felt like a listen to you talk and describe things.. and it seemed like You responded with my joking around the scenarios a bit too. Hehe. I remember your Hashmutash? performance? i cant get that right. Just trying to get everything right for you and having to try to get food out there.. messing up and Gwyen.. Gwyen is the best. She always helped us . I'm sure she is grieving another friend falling.

Thank you again for being there for the last day with me too I'm sorry I couldn't be there with you since dead.

Was fun just goofing out pretending to be drunk. You Gwen and Cali are reasons I love joining the Heralds when ever I make a char in the random times it seems lol.

Stories adventures. fun. Though I did see you fall a few times to the dragon which wasn't cool... The environment was cool but not seeing you fall.

I missed our interactions before I said my goodbyes. I miss your char moving on now too. I hoped to do an age.. Only managed a con once. Ironically this char name I have.

Alpha-Q

This was my first Herald, and totally changed my perspective of this game. You were so much fun - she missed your chewy steaks! There were kind of four phases for her - the formative Gwen/Cal/Darvel/Arstan era, the Shakiniel/Aranir/Dohri glory days, the mopey/lonely yuletide doldrums, and then her resurgence.

You said you put on those gloves that aged you? I had a friend do that a long time ago in Patick days.. not a great char.. But someone close and curious also just did that. lmao.. those things are a curse!

Alpha-Q