Mirrou Steelshade the Cowardly Deserter of the Holy Crusade, Shadow Dweller

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Chapter 6

Abruptly, I left my service at the Fortress. I find it odd that people are
even surprised with this. Haven't they seen me getting weary over the years?
In four decades, I witnessed several generations of pledges becoming
squires, then marans, and fading away. In essence, I devoted to the Fortress
manyfold more time than most do over the course of their whole lives. Yet I
remained a lowly squire.

I know there was a reason for that. I missed something important. But as
nobody stepped forth to tell me what, in a way, they turned their backs on
me long before I came to write this diary entry.

Of course, my decision to leave did not meet any understanding among my
peers. Cowardice is the only thing they could attribute it to... I shall
leave them in their delusion. I am not coming back.

Role

Chapter 5

Spring. A quiet river. I sit on the shore, throwing pebbles into the water.
Thrown, they jump against the surface, unwilling to sink, and leave circles
of waves. One, two, three, four... And I remember my life at the monastery.

Sensei and I sit near a pool and have a calm, relaxed talk. I can't remember
the exact topic, so I give way to imagination now. In my mind, I ask him:
"You told me I must do what my heart desires. What if it desires revenge?"
Before answering, Sensei picks up a flat pebble, throwing it into the water
in a short sweep. In just a moment, I see it hit seven spots in a row, with
ripples spreading from each...
We sit in silence for half a minute, looking at the water. Then he says:
"What you do makes consequences. Does your heart wish to embrace them too?"

The vision disappears. Oh. Have I been daydreaming... but thank you, Sensei!

Role

Chapter 4

Times are dire now, the last year brought many losses among the Fortress
ranks, with very little achievement to make up for it. Worse yet, I have
found myself hostile towards someone I never truly expected to be my enemy.

I cannot accept help from Nexus, with the memory of them slaughtering my
brethren still so fresh. I pray the gods forgive me. I must not stray from
discipline and calm of my faith, thus I will keep myself from arguing or
mocking their beliefs, and I will try to make amends for doing so before.
Otherwise, though, the offenders, Zenze and Chulun, are to only be met with
hostility now. To act differently is a crime against myself.

Role

Chapter 3

I visited Crimsonleaf, to discuss my success with the elders, looking for
enlightenment. Yet, the knowledge merely brings more questions to ponder.

I try to show courtesy. No evildoer can share the truest self-awareness my
faith promotes, and I'm hardly the one to sway minds, but achieving mutual
respect with the enemy is important in my Art's tradition. I am passionate
to follow it - be respectful, or be silent. And, Gods witness, is it hard to
stay true when those I've sworn to protect die, and I live!

I don't want my attitude to be mistaken for weakness or lack of dedication.
This can only be remedied by action, as it speaks truest. So far, while I'm
good at my Art, only five major enemies have been slain. There must be more.

Role

Chapter 2

Our beliefs state that everyone who wants to be happy, should find his Art.
For me, it turned out to be fighting. Only natural that my guildmaster likes
my success, because it is now my heart and soul. However, not everyone is so
blessed, I see many unhappy people around, and should help them find theirs.

There are some, however, whose drive it not as pure. They claim freedom in
wanton destruction, and they fail to see that it cannot be Art. Never can
darkness drive one's heart - it is rather where said heart is driven to,
whether by greed, lust, envy, anger or even despair. I believe firmly that
all these can be fulfilled without committing evil deeds. And thus I am at
ease with trying to put an end to the sway of evil.

That is why I have pledged my blade and my claw to the Fortress of Light.

Role

Chapter 1

I was raised by monks of the monastery of Crimsonleaf, brothers of a small
Order that dwells there for centuries, safely away from major travel routes
of Thera. They possess vast knowledge of arts martial and spiritual. Their
philosophy promotes discipline and calm, but also teaches that one must be
self-aware and embrace whatever enlivens his heart, and this often drives
the brothers of the Order to travel, learn, pursue various arts and rare
professions. And some of them, like me, decide to delve into adventuring.

I hardly remember the time before I was brought there as a young cub. What
made me myself is the Order, and my views on life match those it encourages.
I will return here at times to recount my successes and failures before the
monastery elders. Right now, however, my way lies forward...

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