An earth elemental seems like it would be a perfect match! An earth elemental is larger than you. It looks just as disinterested as you.
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Kicking dirt at an earth elemental seems to do little good.
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You parry an earth elemental's smash. You dodge an earth elemental's smash. An earth elemental is blinded by the dirt in its eyes! Your kicked dirt scratches an earth elemental. Your smash EVISCERATES an earth elemental! An earth elemental parries your smash. Your smash EVISCERATES an earth elemental! An earth elemental is covered with bleeding wounds.
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