Role

Chapter 10

"Dats all bein good m'boy," begins Mum, as she places a bowl of dessert in front
of him. "But 'ow 'bout yer 'eart? Yer bein a changin' lad, 'n sure'n some o'dat's
'cause yer bein a man now wid da full long beard, but some o'dat's seemin ter beh
sometin else, sometin ah ain't sure ah'm likin." "Dis's bein meh now, Mum, 'n
dere's dis fire in meh gut, always burnin, always burnin, 'n ah'm tinking it's
gonnah beh meh life's work ter beh controllin it, usin it, 'n ah ain't sure ah
wouldna want ter beh any oder way. Feelin right, Mum, 'n it 'urts, ah ain't gonna
lie ter yer, sometimes e'en da ale aint 'elpin, but da pain also beh remindin meh
bout Da 'n Erg'ye, 'n 'ow makin da best o'meself's what dey beh wantin, 'n doin it
by killin dem's as beh killin 'em's one o'da ways ah beh doin it, testin mehself
e'ry time, 'n washin da memory in da blood o'da mages. Dat's meh life Mum."

She sits and stares at him, some pride but also some sadness in her eyes, added
to the usual sadness that has shown on her since the death of her husband and
daughter. Maybe it is a stray spark from the hearth or some stray mote of dust,
but for sure it is not a tear of emotion that is quickly wiped away. Finishing
up, Drothgar helps his Mum clear and clean the dishes, helps her with some chores
around the home, and gives her a hug and kiss on the cheek. It's painful to
leave her alone now, and for the hundredth time he tells her she should move in
their relatives, but as always she refuses. It is her home and she won't leave.
Drothgar thinks she can't bear to give up the rooms that give her all the
memories, and in his heart he can't blame her. He himself and that fire he
mentioned are tied up in similar memories, and while on the one hand he'd pay
a dragon's horde to forget the terrible day, he'd pay an even bigger horde to make
sure he always remembers.