So, give or take 23 years ago I felt the same way.

I went on to be highly lethal, quit repeatedly, returned repeatedly, and most recently came back after more than 12-14 yeas away. Since returning I have NOT been particularly impressive in any way shape or form

I will say that it's a LOT harder now. The basic level of the player base has gotten a lot higher, there are more areas to learn, more preps to learn, more skills, etc.

The player base as a whole is more conservative.

You also get less "at bats" -- when there were 200 people on, there were 2-3 ranking groups in your pk range, some dude or two off practicing skills, and a couple of level sitting PKers after you all the time. These days there can be entire log-on sessions where I don't cross paths with the couple of people in pk range.

All of that said, yes, it's harder... but!

The first step is the same.

Study your losses. If not this character, than the one before.

Commit 50 hours to playing EXACTLY what beat you. EXACTLY the way they beat you. Learn what beats them. Rinse, repeat. Over time you will know more in muscle memory, and have a better grasp of dynamics.

If you play exactly what stomped you AND do what they did in combat with you... you'll get some kills. But you'll also see how to counter it, etc. It's a process, enjoy the process