Role

Chapter 6

I was a playful scamp, with a sunny disposition. In a better world where
lineage wasn't of great import I'd have been loved by most, if not all of
those I came into contact with.My mother said that my laughter was like the
tinkling of bells, and that I lit the room when I smiled, which I was often
want to do. She had in her head the most romantic of ideas, the most
fanciful tales of where my life would take me. She was told by her closest
friends that the scorn of the court would pass, and life for me would be
normal, but once I found my voice, and started referring to myself as
'Ellyana's Bastard' in introduction to new strangers, she quickly realized
such was not the case. It is humorous what the young pick up on at their
early ages, I knew that my mother had done something naughty and was
constantly being punished, even if I didn't understand what it was. I'd like
to blame my escapades of naught and chicanery, then, on my mother who while
sheltering me from the cruelties of her fellows taught me that even adults
sometimes find themselves 'at the end of the switch' we'll say.It was nice
to have something in common with her while we shared our time together.I
truly became a mischievous hellion. I can offer no true excuses or apologies
for my childhood, I was a green haired devil. I delighted in the sneaky
escapades which led to countless frustrations on the parts of those I knew
were punishing my mother. From clever humorous pranks, to outright
belligerence in the face of the nobility, I was quickly becoming a force to
be reckoned with. Of course I had no idea at the time that I was proving all
of them true, of the mixing of blood, of the wildness and recklessness of my
father.I heard my mother weeping on countless nights, and I knew she was
troubled, I would rest my head in her lap and she would stroke my hair and
remember the few nights with my father.She had tried dying my hair, shaving
me bald, and whipping me endlessly, but there was no denying my father's
blood. I know why she did what she did, but it still saddens my heart.
Nothing as tragic as killing herself, mind you, but in a way she did kill a
large part of herself when she gave me up. I hold her no ill will and I pray
daily that she might find true happiness in her remaining years.