I don't want forum drama or anything of the sort. This situation is incredibly stupid and should have never happened. If all the players just scroll down to under the stars It would be great. If the imms want to delete part of this then the Asterisks up.

I want to be constructive as possible with this and this first part is about handling "rule breaking".

Did I go OOC? Yes. Was it a constant habit that spanned 300 hours that was a constant disruption to the game? No. It was something that happened after 300 hours of having almost no issues (I broke RP once after hitting a goodie with an illuminate thinking it was Ceva. I had the word #### typed and entered instantly)

Was it egregious? No once again. It was one blatantly OOC tell and a mild meltdown over something that pisses me off beyond anything else as I was trying to log off to deal with something IRL that also angered me. (Admittedly I was more pissed about what was happening outside of the game) Now is any of this the right way to deal with this? No, but I can be pretty confident that both imms and players alike have had days when this has happened. Where they lost their temper and weren't perfectly IC.


Meanwhile outside of this I was avoiding playing to calm myself down and let the annoyance pass. Basically just letting it go so that it would stop happening as it was obviously just frustration seeping through. I logged in and attempted a quick fight while rping with someone. Died which is fine. I was expecting a griefer to grief and lo and behold they did. My reaction? Completely IC and calm. I was over it by that point. I logged off to try and make sure I was properly calm.

I log on the next morning to try and unghost for the event later that day and wake in the RoTD. Confused wondering what it could be. My thoughts being maybe it is because of losing link due to poor internet a lot? Maybe it was the OOC tell and two psuedo OOC tells? I can't think of a reason why that would warrant an offline RoTD. Fine whatever. It's annoying but not a big deal. I wait about half an hour with a few questioning prayers. I log off.

I get on during a more active time and attempt again. Still getting no answer. Spending another hour with increasingly annoyed prayers.

civilized 673/673 915/915 984/984 21600tnl (-30.91%) (10 AM) full
You pray to the heavens for help!
You pray 'I must of done something incredibly horrible. So unspeakably terrible that it warranted being put in RoTD while offline and not being told why.'

I believe this was the worst of it.

So I dmed Ishuli they said they had no idea and it's normal to attempt to get people out of RoTD quick as possible. Alright I'm calmer now. So I wait a bit longer then use the anon to ask the discord imm channel why I'm stuck here. Instantly hostile. Alright back to being angry. Insert hyper rushed both parties annoyed short conversation before being removed from RoTD. Delete try to ask why the heavy handed action. Now I did complain about the imm's ego getting in the way of making the right decision. Told this isn't the proper venue. Ask why it isn't since it is part of why the delete happened.

My answer? #### you (not a figurative #### you a Literal #### you) from Umiron plus an attempt to humiliate me by posting an apology I wrote to them. Which all it proved was that I am human and capable of making mistakes and that I have the intestinal fortitude to apologize when I overreact to a situation while making said mistake. Plus a ban from discord. Which assists the ego point.

Considering how funnyone was acting for nearly 300 hours plus as a cabal leader. Was the heavy handed approach of RoTD while offline and trapping me there required? Did the hostile attitude to my confusion benefit the situation?

Considering the Imm involved stated that they were mostly unaware of the situation, the character involved, and what was causing the issue. It comes to me as someone saw a mild OOC issue, decided it required instant punishment, and RoTD so they can make sure they can be talked to immediately. Except it was offline so the issue became a festering problem. This made the situation worse by adding frustration that wasn't required.

Now did this cause me to delete? No I was deleting because I have personal issues to deal with. Was I going to delete in that moment? No. Probably would of lasted another 50 hours tops to get everything I wanted in order. At several points in this process if the imms chose anything other than the worst way to deal with the problem. This wouldn't of happened. Now are the imms solely to blame? No, but that doesn't make this the correct response or even remotely appropriate.

The question becomes did this situation make the game better? Did the handling create a more immersive experience for the playerbase? Is this way of handle the situation good for retention?

The only arguments against this is were you actually punished? No as it didn't warrant a punishment, Are you banned from CF? No as it didn't warrant a ban. Are you banned from discord? Yes, but it didn't warrant a ban from discord. There should of been some step inbetween offline RoTD that would of fixed this issue without any of this happening.

Any players that read this. Shame on you.

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This was my second longest lived character, my first ever redemption character, and by far the weakest shaman I've ever had by a large margin.

That being said I had zero intention of any of those happening. I rolled this character up to test antihero and play around with hell's pact and possibly more. What ended up happening was following the RP into a redemption arc which once I figured out that would happen I focused all my trains on con. Roughly at hero I ended up with 200-400 hp less than my average shaman. Almost zero stat coverage else I'd be sub 700 hp.

Revelations: I'm glad oracle got fixed, but it also procs off lowbie tribunals for the track the wicked type echoes. Rather enjoyable to fight several magistrates to learn every few ticks that a level 27 trib is sitting at the executioner. Dire omens is a wash, seal fate is a wash, the damange illuminate is kinda nice. This path shines for those that stay still enough for oracle to be useful or work with groups. Both of which I don't tend to do. There are other affects, but none of which are useful to outlanders.

Venoms: Venoms as always is great, but underpowered shaman is underpowered. I needed more hp and stat coverage to make it work and considering all my enemies were near perfect counters was rough. Irony being I'd of killed for this on Dollerveim and on Dichael I'd of killed for Life's champ.

On this I'm thankful for both paths. I am not complaining about it. It is just what it is situationally.

Some goodbyes

Azorinne: Thank you for everything, the echoes and experience of going through the redemption arc was amazing. I know it may not seem like it to you but this was my second longest lived character. I worked hard to stick around and I am extremely grateful for the effort you put in. I just hope you don't feel like it was a waste.

Ishuli: I wanted to try and outtie Ishuli follower. I expected it to go worse than it did and I enjoyed both researching and writing that booklet. I'm sorry I didn't do the event but for reasons I couldn't keep the character going.

Joihe: Thanks for the random edge. Sorry that I never did that favor, but that little nudge helped immensely dealing with the struggles of no prayers.

Ergush: The task you gave me I kinda expected was you just saying hey I'm pretty sure you are going to delete sub 80 hours. Go pound sand. It is why I waited another 200 hours to come back and say maybe reconsider?

Players I'll respond as I can. There was so many people that were amazing to deal with. Also griefer no need to add any comments. I don't care. I do want to say this is the most fun I've ever had playing Cf. The problem is I don't have my temper under control enough for me to continue playing. I'll be back eventually just not anytime soon. I'll come back in another 9 months maybe or for October.