Ok coming back from a very long probably 5 year break, going assassin but can't decide on race, for me it's a toss up between half-elf and felar, any suggestions?

I like felar. You'll want to keep resist heat on hand. Downside: dumbness.

I don't see the appeal in half-elf. If you're not doing felar, might as well go with human or arial.

I say half-elf because better int, str, and they can train dex since dex is the prime stat of assassins, up to 25 I believe

Can't train above your racial max. For those three stats (INT, STR, DEX) you're looking at:

Human: 20, 20, 23
Arial: 19, 23, 25
Felar: 17, 17, 23
H-elf: 19, 21, 24

Things I like about felar:

1. You can use staff/spear and still get dual-wield attacks (though you do give up backfist). This is nice for fighting people who typically don't learn staff/spear. The flip side of this is that you're never going to be able to exploit someone's vuln with both your primary and dual wield.

2. Lots of hp.

3. Only being able to wield one weapon means you don't have to futz around with picking which to weapons to wield. Whenever I play non-felars with dual-wield I have to set up umpteen aliases for every weapon combination I might want to have. It also means you don't have to carry that many weapons since you can't dual-wield them anyway.

Things I like about human:

1. Lowest xp penalty.

2. Possible to wear spike-toed boots if you can ever get your hands on them.

Things I like about arials:

1. Permafly. Helps with thieves. Downside: hard to cover your lightning vuln with gear now that the ancient dragons are hard to kill.

2. Higher int makes learning kicks (and everything else) less time-consuming.