Sun Jul 4 14:45:56 2004

At 8 o'clock PM, Day of Thunder, 3rd of the Month of the Frost Giant
on the Theran calendar Jemar perished, never to return.

Race:	human
Class:	conjurer
Level:	51
Alignment:	Good
Ethos:	Chaotic
Cabal:	FORTRESS, the Fortress of Light
Age:	57
Hours:	264

This character just started really great for me, and I just encountered a lot of problems after a while and lost all enthusiasm for him. I LOVED my role, but it didn't seem to be making any progress, and I honestly was having a very hard time with magic religion. I decided this character was going to tell things how they were, regardless of who it was, or how they reacted. This sometimes involved me publicly dressing down squires, but I wasn't going to accept anything less. Lastly I just don't get the "together" feeling that used to be around with the fortress.

Ryldain- Always nice to talk to you. Your sturdy, and always plugging away, keep at it.

Vahletharien- Just don't know what to make of you.

Audriel- We didn't interact much, but I really loved your character, and the quiet dignity of it.

Hipsin- Damn nice of you to show me some of that stuff.

Various conjurers- I'm sorry we couldn't work together more, but I think we found a lot of things.

Blitzenturt- FRICKIN ANIMAL, heh damn you could be mean. I have to admit that one time in Balator was more or less luck, and a hell of a lot of zapping myself.

imperial horde in general- Some great fights there at the end, but I just got really tired of the "if it doesn't work the first time, bring six more people" and I'm not talking about just you, it's the fortress too. I was either ridiculously outnumbered, or hideously easy because we brought an enormous gang. Hafizar, that other bard, and Yleggo really made my life hell.

Scions- It could go either way with us. I had a lot of interesting conversations, and interactions. I still just don't get you guys, or what you are after heh.

Tribunals- Every time I opened my mouth when I was warranted I was lying my ass off. I don't think I actually ever got out of a warrant, but damn I tried.

Fortress in general- GIVE YOUR MAGES A BREAK! we tried to do the whole "work together" thing, and it basically came down to "well if your preparation takes more than a second, we're going without you". This includes raids, defenses, hunting etc etc etc. Even Celebrimbor ran off and died a few times because he couldn't just wait a few minutes. Your a great bunch of people, but damn we need to work on teamwork, which sometimes includes patience for mages zapping or conjuring.

later folks, sorry if I missed anyone.

BobbyP.

It was fun raiding with you, and as a healer I sure didn't mind the wait (let me put up my protections and rest before going). Wish we could have traveled a bit more, explored some and whatnot, but nonetheless, nice char and good luck with the next.

Thank you. I imagine we didn't talk much because you were out fighting evil - often solo. You showed the necessary effort to make Maran, and had the individual skill to boot. The free time you did have was probably spent sleeping - gotta love conjies.

As for the cohesiveness of the Fort, I think it has to do with a number of influences that promote individualistic behavior.

First, I see player pride at the expense of group solidarity. It takes effort to sacrifice your own interests for the group. It takes effort to actively communicate and account for everyone. It is hard to turn the other cheek if it involves some sort of detriment to your character or reputation.

Second, the Maran philosophy appeals to players who don't like to talk or socialize much. They are out fighting and dying.

Third, I see a rift between the Honor and non-honor players. In general, honor players show disdain for non-honor/gang-friendly players. They often don't want to group with them for a variety of reasons (tainting their reputation, etc). The non-honor players are obviously more prone to ganging, but there is inherently more solidarity in that type of organization.

Fourth, the promotion process breeds individual competition. Maran spots are limited, after all. Taking the time to aid squires in need often wastes time or endangers your character. They might even steal your PK's! Some players might feel that their efforts to compromise or aid other squires are unnoticed: "Screw everyone else, I'm just going do my thing."

Politics alone can make things uncomfortable between players. Feelings of elitism, resentment, and jealousy are rampant anywhere you go.

Group solidarity depends on active effort from everyone. The only way to dispel resentment is to acknowledge each other and communicate. It's only a matter of time before annoyance grows into resentment and hatred, so cabal mates must always be aware of one another.

From what I saw Jemar was pretty competant. My only complaint: while playing another character, I witnessed you kill this guy in Galadon. Think it was a transmuter or thief. The guy went down hard, never had a chance. Your only comment was "Idiot." Now, regardless of whether that was true, it seemed a little cocky and/or irreverant for a Maran to say.

Anyway, good luck on whatever you do next.

It was a scion transmuter, can't remember the name. I had actually told him that I was going to avoid combat with him, because pre-hero I don't like to be warranted. He sees that I'm hurt, attacks me instead, and ends up dying in a round or two. I only made the idiot comment because I had offered him peace, and he broke the offer just to die. Also remember I was trying to play an angel, and I just imagine them as being hardasses that have little tolerance for failure or stupidity.