I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.

Ok, Portal quotes aside, this post:
http://forums.carrionfields.com/dc/dcboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=4&topic_id=121456&mesg_id=121458
And this post:
http://www.qhcf.net/phorum/read.php?2,1051533,1051533#msg-1051533
...fell in love and had a child. And man, was it beautiful.

Miracles happen when you stop trying so hard. Seriously, for my whole CF life I've been placing other players' interests above my own. With this character, I made a simple IC and OOC rule: "my fun > everything else". Picking a role that let me be lazy and do only whatever I enjoyed, and hoping everything else would work itself out. And look, it did.

Being evil -- especially chaotic evil -- was something I always struggled with, and playing Kowelu really helped me understand how to do it. Just get used to the idea of getting your way at others' expense. I manipulated. I ganked. I taunted. I caught people with their pants down. And then I lied, bribed or talked my way out of trouble.

What I didn't do was loot or betray groupmates -- not because of OOC sportsmanship, but because good publicity was useful in the long run. Only short-sighted villains go with the instant gratification route. It was also the reason I stepped up for Heralds when they were in trouble: I enjoyed cultivating a reputation.

Specific note about PK and Heralds: I agree that Heralds are not *about* killing but they are not pacifists either. Kowelu didn't need a reason to attack you other than "it's fun", but there could be a zillion reasons NOT to attack someone: having respect for them, considering them useful, tough repercussions, etc. For the most part, he was fairly easy to befriend because I enjoyed socializing.

I think I had 22 PK wins total, which is satisfactory considering I didn't participate directly in Grand CF CTF.

I will post individual goodbyes later.