Almost all those things you mention could be "fixed" by you asking for help, unless you are playing an evil character.

Get stuck in the sewers? Ask for help. You just need someone to bring you a potion of recall, or cast recall on you. (Alternatively ALWAYS buy one yourself.)

As far as maps go, I don't have maps (although I don't deny that a lot of players access them). I know my way around because I've taught myself. There are a fair number of maps in game (many available from the outfit command) that help you find your way to different areas. I would recommend that when you are not travelling, you pick an area on a map, check the helpfile for it to make sure that it isn't too dangerous, and then go find your way to it.

Get a client and ALWAYS log everything. Then after a group leads you somewhere at high speed, you can look at the log and figure out the path they actually took.

I'm not sure why you are complaining about things you choose to lose control of killing you! Don't keep choosing to lose control! You will probably still lose control occasionally (don't conjure without a circle) but it will be far less frequent.